Monday, January 15, 2007

I Have No Gag Reflex

It's Mid-Atlantic Leather Weekend, and that means the roommate and I have been busy appreciating the sights that have descended upon our great city. The Washington Plaza Hotel is packed with scenes reminiscent of Tom of Finland, although perhaps not as sexy.

If you're interested in Tom of Finland, which arguable popularized the very leather culture we were experiencing, and don’t want to view erotic art at work, you can read about it at Wikipedia. If you're not at work, you can check out the Tom of Finland Foundation, their Online Gallery, or just check out two of my favorites: Reading. That last one reminds me of MOSI, but you don't get to know why. ;)

Besides just noticing a distinct change in who has been walking our streets this weekend, we hit up the Leather Exhibit Hall with DG and another friend, where I bought a shirt proclaiming: I Have No Gag Reflex.

As that story goes, a few years back I was at my dentist of 15+ years when my dental hygienist commented that I had lost my gag reflex. "I haven't had any complaints," I retorted, but then quickly recovered by asking what she was referring to. It seems that when I was younger and needed dental work, I had quite the gag problem. It was one of the few things they had put on my chart, apparently. Anyway, problem gone.

By the way, my reference to the quiet Complaint Department went unnoticed, as a short while later I was asked several gender-neutral questions about my dating life ("Are you dating anyone?" "Where did you meet them?") followed by an indication of just how oblivious she was: "What's her name?" Ug. "Lydia," I coughed up. At that point I tried to change the subject, but she kept coming back to it. When she announced the happy update to my dentist, I couldn't speak (with his fingers in my mouth) and he simply gave a skeptical nod.

Fast forward to this morning, when I was having my teeth cleaned by the less-oblivious hygienist that I favor. Talking about cities, I mentioned Pittsburgh, that I was dating someone, and that HE lived up there. She took that in stride, and soon after commented that either I was finally listening to her about proper teeth hygiene or this relationship was getting serious! It's wonderful how less gum inflammation will win over a dental hygienist's heart.

A bit later she came back to the topic: "So, is this a...NEW thing?" "Uh uh," I declined. "Going on about eight years now, although only eight months with him. We don't usually get to the more personal stuff in our brief sessions here," I followed. "Well, as long as you're happy, and safe, that's all that matters."

So, she's a nice enough lady, but "and SAFE"!?!? I hadn't just told her I have a proclivity for being gangbanged by Manilan streetwalkers, I said I liked boys. No one ever told me to be safe with "Lydia." Bless her heart for trying her best to roll with it, but its going to take a couple of hours with a ball gag, a hood, and a leather whip to get over my frustration with such a double standard.

you're right, that's completely uncalled for. i cant imagine anyone ever telling me the same thing. also, the name "lydia" makes me laugh cause it sounds like chlamydia and i'm 12 years old.
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